Gerald Green was born at halftime of Super Bowl XX, the ’85 Bears up on the Patriots 23-3. The best play in that game wasn’t Fridge’s touchdown run. That was boring. It was the play where he tried to throw a pass out of a halfback option and got hit for a one yard loss. That’s way more fun than someone scoring, but all clips of that are lost to time.
What if Green had gone to Oklahoma State? Would anything have gone differently for him? He’d have been out there with JamesOn Curry, Byron Eaton, and Mario Boggan. Remember those floppy socks Curry wore? Remember that banked three Boggan hit to beat Durant’s Texas team a year or so later? Remember Eaton almost not fitting into his jersey?
That ’05-’06 Cowboy team wound up 17-16, a young bunch of stud recruits unable to live up to the John Lucas III, Daniel Bobick, Graham Brothers Final Four team from the year before. That team Green would have been on was Eddie Sutton’s last at OSU. In February of ’06 he got busted for driving under the influence after he ran into another vehicle, then into a tree. Witnesses told stories about seeing him stumbling in the parking lot before driving off in his Durango. He blew a .22 that night, resigned later that year.
It’s weird to think about now. Remember in 2007 when he coached the University of San Francisco for a minute so he could get up over 800 wins? That’s a bummer version of Sutton to remember. I like another. The one who once asked a GA to tape Lonesome Dove and clip out all the commercials so his wife Patsy wouldn’t have to deal with any of the ads.
Green’s had a strange road. He’s played for eight different teams in the league and this is his second stint with the Celtics. They drafted him in 2005. Same year they drafted Ryan Gomes and the Pride of Louisiana Lafayette, Orien Greene. I know he drafted Big Al and Perk—and those are the two best guys he’s drafted heretofore—but don’t let them call Ainge a seer.
Gerald’s got springs. Won the NBA Slam Dunk Contest in ’07. That’s forever ago, but the bounce has stayed. He’s still regularly making sex eyes at the rim and has dunked enough throughout his career that there’s a video on YouTube of his top 200 dunks. You get up to two bills worth of SEND IT INs you’ve been jumping with some authority for some time. In 2005 he won the McDonald’s All-America Game Slam Dunk Contest. He beat McBob in the final. So, you know, Green, I mean, that’s a hero right there.
